Just Be Happy

So, I have now completed the 10th day of my first 30 days of life coaching. Not training, but actually being coached. I should have already linked my website here, but I am not ready to share it with all my readers yet. In time...in time...when I know more about what I am doing.

So far, I have learned:

That I am often my own internal enemy, which causes me to take the wrong external decisions.

That I let other people's opinions define much of what I will and will not accomplish.

That I am great at adjusting to change, but I am not so great at remaining focused, taking care of myself, or starting and keeping good habits.

But this is changing, because now that I am a member of Compass and receiving coaching via my email inbox, and personally, from my coach via phone and email daily, I am understanding things I never did before. All those converts with the mentors, they know something. They know they need this in order to stick it out as a good Catholic. A successful Catholic.

Today, my husband and I faced a personal crisis that we, both, agreed really could and should be handled with grace. We had spent a good portion of last night preparing for it, dealing with it in our sleep, and then readying ourselves in the morning for whatever outcome God would allow.

I did not listen to my MAP (my daily five minute Compass coaching) to know what today's challenge was, but when I did, I would learn that it applied perfectly to what I needed to learn today.

The outcome, in the end, of the crisis was not quite as bad as we thought, but it was pretty undesirable none-the-less. It was totally unfair. It was unkind and should never have happened. But what can we do, my husband and I, about the actions of other people?

Not much.

So, together, we came to the conclusion that we should just handle this with every bit of grace God gives us, and not let the desperation of other people keep us from our goal of taking care of our family by serving God in the capacity in which He has commanded us to personally.

I write down a lot notes from my coaching sessions, but one today sharply embedded itself in my mind.

"The quality of your life is created by what you focus on."

In other words, your life is really only as peaceful, joyous, effective, as your ability to control your complaints about the actions of others. You can't control others - even horribly tyrranical dictators eventually learn this lesson.

So, we did the right thing, after all, I realized.

We know what we want for our life.

We recognized the obstacles when we saw them today.

We rejoiced when we realized God always provides a way out of crisis through that wonderful gift called "attitude".

But a lot of us are not too eager to change the attitude that has allowed us all our complaints, all our anger, given us justification for our unforgiveness or judgement, or that makes us eternally defensive. But it is such a prison to live outside of joy. And joy really is something you must choose. It doesn't just happen. It is what becomes of getting off the wheel of false belief that says, "You can have everything just the way you want it, if you just fight for control of all that is uncertain." That's like suggesting that unicorns will save you one day from higher taxes, for sure!

"It is so much easier just to be happy,"

Meryl Streep in One True Thing by Anna Quindlen (Great book. I highly recommend it. The movie is even better.)

The Post That Was Here

There was a post here, but it was too long. I will tackle the subject in shorter form after some coffee, a walk with the dog, and a good book. Or maybe...if you read it, you were lucky and something else will inspire me soon enough.

October 17th!

I just want to remind you, Miss Thang...because I know you always read my blog.

A Favor?

Hey pals...if you are bored today and want natural health articles to read...short ones...click on my profile below (in two places) and check out some of my work at Associated Content. It seems my page hits have dwindled with my lack of activity (ever since the newspaper promised such large successes).

Anyway...click here to view me and choose whatever is interesting. Seriously, just click:)

I will be forever grateful.

Tiffani Burnett-Velez's Contributor Profile - Associated Content

http://www.associatedcontent.comuser/130961/tiffani_burnettvelez.html

Give Me a Break

I have some issues with bloggers who get a lot of praise from sappy women who knit.

True story.

I read some amazing blogs where women tell of their conversion stories, their dedication to healthy living, surviving horrible bouts with cancer, or just living day to day as a stay at home mom and wading through all the physical and emotional strain that can produce.

However, I immediately recoil when their groupie-type readers continually respond with unending praise, even for crappy posts or posts that could bore the paint off a light post. When I write poorly, one of my most valued gifts from my dedicated readers is their singular act of ignoring me.

I used to take this personally, but now I take it as constructive criticism: Post too long, Post too deep for a Chocolate Cake Friday, Post too boring and they stopped reading even when I was still impressed. Post just really not all that interesting to my readership.

Why do others not get this? Why do lonely people want to follow them around crying aloud, "I love you like your words are my big bowl of ice cream on a sad day!"

So, why do these often brilliant bloggers accept so much fluff and wet kisses?

"Oh! You are so brilliant Belinda Blogger! You have such tremendous insight into the ugliness of human nature! How did you keep your pristine spirit so snow white all these years in the coal black world of lust and sin??!!"


Many a moment I have erased my words, "What a load!"

There is no way these people cry over the lost soul of Adolf Hitler while they were sewing their husband's organic cotton underwear in their secret missionary hut.

Come off it! (When I am sickened by mushy kissee-poo talk between virtual admirers/real life strangers, I get a British accent in my mind and insult intelligently).

And lonely lurkers with starry eyes, you should start your own blogs. I imagine your lives are far more interesting than you think. You can link the whole big fat world with this Internet thing. It's a fun ride. Spilling your stupidity for all mankind to examine from the comfort of their messy computer desk at work.

Duh!

Manischewitz!

All those who know me, know that this is my all time favorite made-up Yiddish swear word. I love to spend time using it when I am really irritated. It makes one instantly feel better.

Today, I am irritated.

We were supposed to have watched the house go to sale tomorrow, but mercifully, the date was rescheduled so that the mortgage company can jockey with the investor who wants to buy the place. Good news. It looks like our house will sell after all.

So the sheriff (who never bothered to notify us of the old date) rescheduled the threatened foreclosure and came by our home when we were not there today to give us the info - at the old house. My brother lives there now full-time. He relayed the message. The sheriff is willing to meet us up at the old house, or even just have us come down to the courthouse. HOWEVER...

My husband calls the sheriff and invites him to come to our new home in the middle of town, where everyone knows us, where people actually just randomly stop by because they heard rumor we live here, where tourists pass all day long, and those who don't know us are just now coming to the conclusion that we are okay. The sheriff even suggested that we could just pick up the papers.

But he is inviting the sheriff here with his car and his blazing lights.

Thank you, husband.

He wonders why I do not like this idea.

I post it because, Manischewitz!, it makes me mad and this concept severely confuses him. But I know, out there in cyberworld, many women will understand my extreme irritation at this and will understand me.

Someone should understand this, right?

I do not speak with him today. He makes his own dinner.